Photo Credit: Rachel Felber
Singing What is Love, baby don?t hurt me! It?s a topic, discussion, debate, question and mystery everyone has been tossing back and forth for years. Some want it, some run from it. But most sincerely cannot define or recognize it. Often-times people mistake lust for love. What is the difference? Well here are some speculations on it.
If you have chosen to be a part of the notorious dating world, you have either experienced some interest or were involved in interactions that fall into one of these two categories. How can you tell whether your attractions and emotions are lust or love-based? First you have to identify the qualities of each category and where your feelings align with these concepts. According to Helen Fisher from Rutgers University, there is a difference in the emotional and psychological components of love and lust. Love elevates from the dopamine and serotonin in the body (howstuffworks.com). Love typically generates oxytocin, whereas lust is a result to the release or excess of testosterone. The role of chemical components has a relationship to the psychological effects love and lust have on a person. Lust can be referred to as an altered state of consciousness (psychology.com). The effects of lust are similar to what the brain experiences when an addict gets it fix from drugs (psychology.com). The release of these chemicals trigger psychological effects that have the capacity to develop addictive tendencies or qualities. Consider how this manifests in relationships or relations. The love phenomenon demonstrates these qualities through particular behaviors. PDA, kissing, cuddling, excessive emotional expression, obsession, infatuation, etc. Can we blame not being able to spend a minute without someone on these chemical imbalances? Or is it irony that we are susceptible to such erratic patterns of interest?
There have been some proposals as to how to differentiate between love and lust. Lust tends to be primarily focused on the physicality of relations. A person?s physical appearance (looks and body) become that catalyst for existing emotions. The interests of lust are centered around sex or physical activity rather than plutonic or neutral conversations. The relationship between people who lust for one another are likely to remain on the fantasy level rather than based on actual expressed emotions and feelings (psychology.com). Since the interaction is focused on the physical activity, the people involved generally leave or disconnect after the physical.
While there is no exact definition, classification or way to measure love, it has many more involved characteristics than lust. Some of the factors involve genuine compatibility, sincere interest, desire to spend significant time with the person free from the physical, discuss and foresee a future, integration of one another into social and personal circles (teenbreaks.com). Some other signs are including the person in plans or seeking their advice. Do you find yourself seeking the person of your interests counsel or advice? Love has clich? identifiers. Recognizing it against lust should be evident in the level of investment put into the interactions between two people.
People battle between these two concepts while trying to establish their level of interaction. What?s the BIG deal? Have we magnified or activated an extreme societal expectation for the storybook ending? People seem to sustain themselves with the expectancy that relationships and interactions are in the black or the white; the idea of no gray area in human behavior may be attributed to the social and digital expectations of the ?in-love? frenzy. Some people are a couple of daydreams away from mental marriage. Could there be a correlation between the increased casualty of sex and dating? You can only teeter-totter back and forth from single to taken before your expectation of the ?next-step? starts to register. The love-lust war is the orientation for the development of the forever. So for some, love and lust have begun to merge and resemble one another. This creates the confusion of genuine emotions versus pseudo-love (aka lust). Unsuccessful relationships may be likely to occur if they are based on false or premature evaluations of emotions. Do you know the difference?
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Related posts:
- Love Y Relationships: Breaking the Silence Women?s Conference
- Love & Relationships: You?re Dating a WHAT?!
- Love & Relationships: Who Do You Love?
- Love & Relationships: Operation Communication
- Love & Relationships: Addicted to Love?
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